It’s About Making Babies!

Timing.

I got to thinking. We hear that much of life is about timing. Being available when an opportunity arises. Being in the right place at the right time. Being ready to take a chance, to succeed.

No “good ones” left

It seems that there are all too many people eager to begin a relationship.

A relationship snack.

Many start a relationship they expect to last an evening, and may or may not include sexual intimacies. Others date for recreation, and may “hold out” until the second or third date – every time. And very seldom does this social activity result in building a family.

But what about the observation that “all the good ones are married”? What if the best prospects found themselves attached early in life, and are content to stay there (at least for now)? What if everyone “available” past the age of nineteen (19) is a “passed over” second string – or reject – prospect?

What if there aren’t any “good” people left?

A full meal.

That isn’t so. It cannot be. There are too many honest and honorable people wending their way through life. The problem is – they aren’t “available”. They aren’t looking for change in their lives. And they certainly aren’t dating or hanging out at singles venues. They work, or volunteer, or help their family. They may be active in their community, or work and enjoy their hobbies and crafts and reading and TV at home. If you are excited about model trains, and join the local train club, you might meet one, or maybe not. If you joined the JayCees or Kiwanis you might meet one, or maybe not.

Satisfied

The point is that after the early twenties, many of the best people, the ones with healthy emotional ties, good ethics, and good character – choose to address a hunger in their life – that isn’t a relationship.

Courtship

The task, should you choose to accept it, is to locate a potential mate prospect. Next is to court that prospect. To pursue them in a manner they find acceptable. To tantalize and awaken their hunger for a relationship. To share with them a vision and dream of a life and home and family the two of you might build And all the while, respecting their dreams and their values.

And this gets tough. Because change is measured in pain. A relationship or family or mating is an obligation as much as it is a relationship, or a blessing. A responsible person will consider that joining another to build a family means sacrificing time, effort, and satisfactions in their lives – for the chance that a new life will be reasonably fulfilling and fruitful.

Setting the table

The people with the most productive lives won’t have much time for dating. Their nights often end asleep by 9:00 pm or 10:00 pm. They may not see the point in hanging out where single people hang out. A club may be “hot” or an event may be the most popular – but might not fire the imagination of a carpenter, or banker, or mechanic.

Courting a good mate prospect may mean the end of dating as a lifestyle. Not an end of dating if the relationship becomes something long term, or if it ends in marriage – but an end to dating in order to begin a relationship.

If you list the last ten things you found fun, and eight or more had something to do with a bar, a club, or after 10:00 pm, then are you sure you are ready to give up being single, to start living the life of a mate? When you court a good prospect for a life-mate, you are making an implied promise to abandon dating as a social recreation.

Just how hungry are you?

According to Steve Buscemi, playing a shrink in Sandra Bullock’s movie, “28 Days“, one definition of insanity is to repeat the same action and hope for a different result. Sort of like tossing a coin into the same wishing well. Again and again. Or trying to find an honest, common-sense, nurturing mate hanging out at a singles bar.

My clock radio is set to come on for Paul Harvey‘s 4 minute morning news snippet. I like the quick and pithy way he relates many of the most significant items of news for the day, with a few interesting bits and comments, too. I try to catch his noon news 15-20 minute show, for about the same reasons. The “Rest of the Story” segments are interesting, but I seldom catch them.

So, this year Paul was ill for an extended time. Ron Chapman is my bestest, most favorite alternate. His presentation emulates, with respect, Mr. Harvey’s signature delivery and content. Ron is himself, and I really adore what he brings to the show. At first, Ron would fill in for both the morning and noon daily programs, which was great. I looked forward to the programs, wholeheartedly.

Paul Harvey, Jr., has won several awards for his writing and production, and in recent years, his performance on the Rest of the Story program.

Now Paul Harvey, Jr., seems to have inherited the morning news program. Instead of news that I can use to keep track of the issues of the day – that help me understand what my neighbors or a glimpse of the TV mention – I get snippets of “interest” stories. Instead of covering the Obama transition, instead of covering other important topics, I got 90 seconds about a Canadian version of the Loch Ness Monster this morning.

And I keep turning on the radio to listen to Paul Harvey, or at least Ron Chapman doing the program I find useful. And I get Paul Harvey, Jr., trying to turn an inheritance of gold to a whim of his own. Gack.

I wish Ron Chapman, Paul Harvey, and Paul Harvey,Jr., the best of everything. But it has been months, now, and Paul Harvey, Jr., claims to have letters of appreciation for his change to the format. It feels to me like putting a Disco program in the middle of the day on a Country station. An old-time, “country gold” station. So it appears the only way out of my insanity, my hope for morning “Paul Harvey News Update” to once again actually mention the news, is to wish the boys well, and find my own way into the day.

If only. My dream world would have the retired Ron Chapman, 45 year Dallas radio veteran, resume the microphone for the morning program as well as his occasional returns at noon.

Yes, things change. But I am responsible for the changes I support, and to recognize when a relationship has ended. I guess I have to look for a more fulfilling morning program. Or be crazy. *sigh*