Second guessing bystanders
Back to Rachel Lucas‘ story of a hit and run accident that left an 80 year old man lying in the street, with people standing and looking on. A bicycle rider turned around to avoid the scene, at least one driver paused and then drove past.
Commenters on Rachel’s story figure the problem is large populations - where individuals focus on themselves instead of the group. Or on not caring. Or native ignorance and stupidity or moral cowardice or antisocial behavior (jerks and assholes). I wrote on this one, too.
The comments so far on rachel’s site (67 and counting) overlook a couple of factors. One is that, depending on where you are, bullies, thugs, and gangs can make a hostile environment. That is, you risk you rife for noticing what might be a planned attack. Or noticing something done by a thug, bully, gang, or corrupt cop. Thankfully, places where you have to worry about the cops being bent are rare in the US, but such places do exist, outsiders beware. And hostile environments are cancers - they grow, the toxins spread, and social welfare and good will wither around them. Living near a hostile environment - it might be as small as the berthing compartment one deck up on a US Navy cruiser - teaches people to *not* get involved. That trying to help creates more victims, and not just the wannabe helper.
Many people are helpful. They see what needs doing, and do their best to help. They had role models, people they respect that were helpful, or experienced the help of others. These are world-expanding, eye-opening, life-changing events. Some very few people can pick up the ‘helpful’ lesson from watching the news, a sitcom, or a documentary about helping. But it often takes a respected, helpful role model to change a person.
Children see the world in balance. Growing up, our parents, guardians, teachers, and other authority figures establish weights on things. “Don’t touch!” is one way to identify non-toys, or dangerous things. The prohibition to keep to ourselves, not to meddle in someone else’s affair, these are strong and secure and safe perspectives. We want our families thinking this way - we want them to avoid getting hurt, and keeping to home and familiar things is an important safety guideline.
Hunting, defending, attacking - causing injuries has always been a warrior’s role, something the hunter learns, and the head of household. Today, as in the Wild West, the emphasis is to limit beatings and maimings to court proceedings rather than physical body attacks. The other site, binding wounds, is likewise well taught - today, though, the emphasis is on legal affairs defense, rather than against guns, knives, or other brutal weapons.
Physical injuries can be cared for. Many of us get some rudimentary class in health or first aid, but we get to use it so seldom the information starts to seem like understanding why Charlemagne mattered - others work with whatever was important. Healing, midwifery, and medical care is a kind of magic, or possibly religious. Work or actions that affect whether a life continues or ends, whether a body will heal or never recover functions, this is big medicine. Magic. A miracle. For those with experience, with training, or even just close contact with what happens around a serious injury, some of the mystique clears away. But there is a real hurdle, to thinking of yourself as being ready or able to help someone in serious distress.
We have all seen in real life just like in the movies and on TV. The first thing the professionals do - from paramedics to police - is to tell bystanders, “Move back, give us room to help.” Meaning, “you are all incompetent and making this problem worse. Go away, that is the best you can do to help this person.” That is, the city and nation train citizens to stay away - that only ‘professionals’ are allowed or able to help. Except maybe a doctor.
And that is possibly what the bystanders faced. Not the man lying in the road, but whether they saw themselves as able to do anything useful. The police reported on this incident, that their dispatch received 4 cell phone calls within a minute of the accident. That was a reasonable response for some of them. With our electronic-centric culture today, this is probably the limit of social interaction that some people can comprehend.
One other possible reason for a difference between rural and urban responses to accidents, is that farm folk don’t believe that a doctor or ambulance is close enough to help. They weren’t their for their parents and grandparents, and the family lore is to deal as best you can and get the victim to the hospital. That is: Jump in. There are far fewer times on a farm that you are told, ‘get back’. It is more likely, “Get a blanket, grab some sacks, keep them hogs back.”
I did some substitute teaching at the local school five years ago. I recall the two hour training session. Over an hour was on contamination and spread of disease through blood, mucous, saliva, etc. When I was in school, the teacher washed minor cuts to get the injury clean so it would heal well. Today the school (teacher’s union?) is critically and legally concerned about getting someone sick from contact with an injured student or staff member. That kind of emphasis tends to reinforce, “don’t try to help, amateur, leave it for the professionals.”
One comment on Rachel’s site mentioned stopping traffic. I learned to walk in the street in Marking Band in school. I still recall the illicit thrill, and the worry, about violating instructions to stay on the sidewalk. In the US Navy, we marched a bit, especially in boot camp, and everyone got a chance to be road guard. We had to be taught how to do this, and it took time to really, firmly believe that traffic would avoid running us, or our company, right over. Not everyone has the chance to learn something that simple. Most drivers know they are expected to avoid accidents, that they shouldn’t just run over someone standing in the road. But there is a confusion, when you see someone that isn’t dressed in uniform trying to stop cars, someone that isn’t wearing bleeding-eye orange. So how many people will create the idea, on a moment’s notice, that *they* can act as a traffic guard for the man lying on the street?
The big problem is inexperience. The bystanders had never had the thoughts, the role models that explained what they could do. I imagine the bystanders at this gentleman’s accident were hampered by conditioning, not by lack of caring.
So, next time you are out walking with your kids or grand kids, and you see someone hurt - do you protect the kids and keep them away from a possibly dangerous situation, or do you show them how to help?