It’s About Making Babies!

I saw a t-shirt the other day, that just seems .. horrible.

Do you believe in love at first sight?
Or should I walk by you again?
- Hooters

So I get this email, from Amanda. Amanda is the ex-girlfriend of my neighbor’s nephew, who just got married last June to a good man. And I am still on her email list. This morning I get these points to ponder for 2008.

Ten Things to Ponder for 2008

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8
Men have two emotions:
Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a
sandwich.

Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day, teach a person to use
the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky ..Not really good for anything, but you
still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
of nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
Criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax
cut saves you $30.00?

Number 2
In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
Weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought For 2008:
We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among
millions and millions of cows in America but we haven’t got a clue as to
where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe
we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Immigration.

“Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers.
What you do today, may Burn Your Ass Tomorrow”.

Number eight struck me as related to the above t-shirt. It seems like Homes for Humanity, the Salvation Army bell ringers and other volunteer efforts, churches, schools, railroads, and many other organizations and niches in society might quibble about that narrow definition of uses for a man, or relevant interactions between men and women.

But I understand. At times we can simplify our treasures and our problems. And I think the Hooter’s t-shirt bothers me more. Not only did the lady expect her breasts to win her instant love and admiration - she implies people that don’t agree are damaged.

I suppose a woman that uses words pasted across her chest to find a mate, probably deserves a guy that watches women’s tits and then reads the t-shirt. And they can just deal with what five years time or a change of t-shirt, or observing another set of breasts, will do to their relationship.

And, yes, I believe in love at first sight. I think it usually starts with an offer of help, or a smile. I don’t think love ever happens until you give of yourself.

Back in my day there was consternation, wailing, and gnashing of teeth about the end of the family. Parent’s couldn’t keep their kid’s attention, many families didn’t seem to try.

Television. Dubious morals, violence in news, in fiction, and marketing to susceptible minors. TV took kid’s attention. We lived immersed in Star Trek, As the World Turns, The Garry Moore Show, and Captain Kangaroo (his coat had big pockets). Parents had little opportunity to discuss family history, values, goals. Kids developed dreams and life goals that their parents couldn’t understand - and couldn’t help them plan for.

Today we have text messaging. And DVD players. And MP3 players, etc. And the parents grew up disconnected from their family and don’t see a problem.

I sat behind a young family last night, at the local movie theater (National Treasure: Book of Secrets, very good, if not as exciting as the first one). The 6th grade (my guess) boy had his cell phone open, text messaging. During the movie. I leaned forward and said, “You have to turn the cell phone off.” His father told me, “He is just text messaging.”

The kid was quiet, turned off the cell phone. But his *father* really disturbed me.

Most families are unhappy with movie ticket prices ($5.50 for the kid last night), yet they wanted to pay for the ticket and not expect the kid to pay attention to the movie? Or worse, are so used to divided attention - texting while watching TV, during meals, in the car, and during other possible times to share with the family - that it never occurs to the parents to teach their children to ‘watch’ the movie. Ideally, going to the movie is about more than the popcorn and the story, it is about joining with an audience, about sharing reactions to the unfolding story.

Not to mention, the cell phone acts as a flashlight in the darkened theater. Which makes a constant distraction from the film for many people around the light source. People that paid for their tickets for a movie, not a preventable, rude distraction.

And the kid’s father saw nothing wrong, with the kid text messaging, creating a light source in a darkened theater, instead of watching the movie with his family and the rest of the audience.

I wonder what this man’s definition is, of ‘family values’.