I think there are people that feel responsible for most of the people they encounter, while others see the world as a set of resources and assets that enable one to survive.

Most people are a mix, in between these extremes. And most people learn the benefits of the other view point, learning lessons in life to broaden their perspective. This learning, this change, is most often measured in pain.

When I mention low self esteem, I am not speaking of an injury or something broken. Low self esteem, to me, indicates that one takes less care, is less aware of, their own resources or status, than they are aware of the needs of others. They strive to be ‘useful’ rather than in unchallenged control of their own (growing and commanding) pile of assets. I consider this a world view, not a sickness that needs curing.

And I imagine you are correct, that those on either end of the ‘useful vs. assets’ spectrum have low self esteem. It is the moderation of extreme focus that increases their happiness and acceptance by peers. What we call self esteem - how we feel about ourselves and our role in society - is usually established and reinforced by how others regard us.

If Liz or others are reluctant to ask for pay, it is likely because they see their service, providing advice, is their only utility to those around them. A more asset-minded person sets the value on the advice or service, not the people they help. So the answer is going to be to find a place to serve - a job - that lets others value and allot her work, to change her fundamental work view to assign value to the work she does instead of the people she helps, or some combination.

I agree with your excellent points towards the end of your post. However, some of the riches and most successful leaders I know, and I know a lot, are exceptionally giving, and have been throughout their life, not when they got to a place where giving didn’t hurt. The myth that personalities with strong giving tendencies are the followers and not the leaders isn’t true.

The complexities of blogging, as you point out, is that blogging is about giving as part of the marketing plan, but sometimes it’s hard to pay the rent when everything thinks it’s all for free.

I think you are on to something in your conclusions. Thanks!