It’s About Making Babies!

Lately I have been focusing on avoiding problems – by picking a mate with good character. When I look at articles like this request for advice on Baggage Reclaim, my first thought is ‘Yep. Picked a Schmuck. Got Schmucked. Next time I hope she picks a good man.”

Bonding to a partner is an active task. There are certain chemistry aspects that will influence the way you feel, as you grow together. Sharing breaths, sharing none-verbal communication, and demonstrating courtesy, integrity, and honesty to each other help and cause your body and your perceptions to adjust to a an intimate life with this partner.

Starting out with someone suitable for a life-long relationship is an important part of the successful process. In a couple of ways.

First, not allowing yourself to associate with people that regularly deceive, are discourteous, or that you don’t respect is a Very Good Thing. You won’t unintentionally pick up bad habits from scum if you don’t make them part of your life. Plus, by deciding to evaluate a mate based on character – honesty, integrity, courtesy, hospitality, discipline, and existing life-long family bonds and strong friendships – you also develop an ‘eye’ for these characteristics, or their lack. The act of looking for character makes you more likely to act with honesty, with courtesy, with discipline – in short, makes you a better partner for your mate.

Your life might not be as exciting spent in a ‘vicious circle’ of courtesy, discipline, and affection. But the chances of support, of commitment, of joy may actually be more satisfying.

Ian Stewart of Upper Fort Stewart ask about what scary books we (I) have read.

I remember reading Stephen King’s ‘Carrie’. I took it to be a paranormal (she called down the meteor shower on her house) .. adventure? Then I saw the movie, and lost interest in Stephen King. Yuck. Years later a roommate watched ‘Firestarter’ with Drew Barrymore. I stumbled on the book – that was OK.

But I really don’t read horror.

In recent years many fantasy stories have strayed into demons, fallen angels, vampires, zombies, etc. Which seems a stretch. So I found Anne Bishops’ ‘Black Jewels’ series, of the three rings of Hell and the demons that live there, etc. A fun read.

For a month the local Hastings store mis-shelved some Kelley Armstrong books about ‘Ladies of the Underworld’ – Haunted, Dime Store Magic, Industrial Magic, and other titles, Bitten, Stolen, etc. A good author and very good read.

A favorite author, Robin McKinkley wrote a recent Vampire book – ‘Sunshine’ – our heroine is chained in a room with a starving vampire as the sun is coming up .. Another good story.

Scary stories, though. Maybe ‘Deerskin’, Robin McKinley? It was certainly disturbing, even the second time through. Maybe some of Mercedes Lackey’s ‘Serrated Edge’ stories of elves helping modern day abandoned and neglected kids on the street.

For the most part, I guess I see most stories as adventures. They either tell an entertaining story about some characters, or the author has wandered off into something that doesn’t seem entertaining. Just stupid.

Mercedes Lackey did write a ghost story, I guess. The Lark & The Wren is a coming-of-age story (I do like those!) about a girl that dares herself to fiddle for the local ghost – that has killed everyone that wandered onto a certain stretch of road for many years. But, like Lois McMaster Bujold’s ‘Diplomatic Immunity’, where Miles spends a good part of the last third of the book dying of an incurable military disease (and survives) while solving the puzzle and avoiding a needless war and saving a not-quite-enemy, I just see a good adventure story.

Patricia Briggs started doing some ‘underworld’ vampire/werewolf/walker stories. Moon Caled and Blood Bound are two *very* good books. Just more about adventure than scary, at least for me.

I mean, Stuff Happens. Does anyone dwell on the horrid things that happened to Forrest Gump, or do they remember the chocolates and haircut? The movie there was OK, but the book was a different story – at least as good as the movie, just different. In the book Momma runs off with Protestant instead of dying, etc.

Sorry, Ian, but I don’t recall reading scary books and thinking, ‘wow, that was scary’. I just read (and remember and re-read) good books.