Rude People vs. Tech - Are bad manners the only threat?
Regina Lynn, regular Sex Drive columnist for Wired.com, makes a point that Rude People, Not Tech, Cause Bad Manners.
I mentioned a few weeks ago an incident where text messaging ended up with a girl cooing and cuddling for half an hour with a boy.
I think that is the most important problem with cell phones, text messaging, pagers, etc. A person that wants to communicate with another electronically has no idea how ‘available’ - between obligations - the recipient might be. Regina might consider those that don’t care if their party is available to be rude. I wouldn’t disagree. But there is an onus, once a communication starts, to continue to a conclusion.
Abuses of people, by continuing a conversation past the time one of the parties is comfortable did not originate with electronic gadgets. I experienced one form of conversational intimidation as a recreation for bullies, in the US Navy. Some senior enlisted would deliberately prolong a completed conversation - because they could. They made a game of it.
Other conversational abuses exist. A co-worker at a company in Silicon valley got a call from his wife. Every morning, every afternoon, at least twice a day. And never for less than 45 minutes each call. Sometimes this seemed selfish, and an unwarranted waste of the company’s time and money. Other times I resented the work that he didn’t get accomplished, that impacted my tasks. Every day. Neither seemed to resent the communications, yet the calls were a glaring disrespect from her for his work, and disrespect from him for his employer and coworkers.
Working part time at the local theater, several people carry their cell phones all the time, and use every spare moment text messaging someone. The company requires we check each auditorium every 15 minutes for viewing quality, to assure quiet in the auditorium, and to detect anyone with a cell phone or other electronic gadget - to prevent pirating images and clips of movies, to prevent the light source from irritating other guests. Oh, and to make everyone take their feet off the seat in front of them (it tears up the seats, really). Some of these checks don’t happen, but the text messaging isn’t interrupted. Bathrooms are to be checked every 30 minutes. Some of those checks don’t get made. Etc. I see the same problem at a local grocery/take out store. People standing with their cell phone, in conversation or texting, and orders waiting or shelves unstocked.
It isn’t only the town bully that I consider rude. It is a family member that wants to chat with someone on the time clock, or someone at an event they intended to view or participate in. It is someone wanting to flirt with a person making business arrangements or out in public, where distractions could become safety issues quicker than you could drop your phone.
Sorry, Regina. I think tech gadgets have opened up entire new vistas of otherwise well-behaved individuals to disrespect the choices others make on spending their time.