It’s About Making Babies!

There I stood behind the movie concession stand counter. About an hour into ‘I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry’, a teen boy comes out of the theater to the lobby. About ten (10) minutes later a couple of girls pull up in a car and mill about in front of the theater. The boy joins them. They look to be 8th or 9th graders, about 13-14. The girls might be sisters, the boy maybe a year older. After a few minutes one girl takes off in the car; the boy and younger girl enter the lobby.

The two stand and talk, quietly. A few kisses occasionally. They embrace, rub each other’s backs, hands don’t roam *too* badly. After about four (4) minutes of one particular long smooch, I told them, “Oh, please! Get a room!”, after a few more seconds to show they weren’t worried about me, they went back to rubbing shoulders and sides and talking. This continued for a while.

The car returned, the driver honked the horn. About a dozen annoying, short bleats of the horn later, and the girl actually starts telling the guy goodbye. He returns to the auditorium where ‘Chuck and Larry’ is playing with about 15 minutes of movie left.

I was a bit surprised that the conduct was as ‘clean’ as it was - that long a contact, periods of kissing, and no serious groping. I am sure their parents will be relieved.

But what really struck me was that: 1) She had to call him out of the theater - in the theater your cell phone is supposed to be turned off; and 2) She showed an enormous and critical lack of respect for him, for his choices, and his family (a younger brother, inside watching the show).

Umm, theaters have to honor the movie industry’s demands to prevent pirating - stealing snapshots or clips of movies. The theater owner association has a $500 bounty for employees that report pirating to the police - a girl just pleaded guilty and paid a fine for snapping 20 seconds of ‘Transformers’ for her kid brother. Plus, an open cell phone acts as a flashlight, distracting others. The reason for dimming the lights during the movie is to create an illusion that you are viewing the event alone, or with only a few others, making the experience more ‘personal’. This is one reason anything that attracts attention - talking, lights, noises, etc. - is so bad. No one paid to have your flashing screen or talking or seat kicking distract them from the story on the screen.

About the disrespect. He chose to spend a few hours on Saturday with his brother, at this movie. Whether or not this was his first choice for how to spend this time, whether or not talking with her and kissing were more fun, the fact remains - she claimed precedence over his choices for the moment. She did not honor him. Whether from arrogance, self indulgence (she appeared to enjoy the kissing and rubbing, too), or ignorance, she interrupted his activity. Will she be as cooperative when he sees her shopping with a sister and asks her to step aside and cuddle and talk a while? Will she reimburse him for the cost of the ticket, for the movie he saw the first half and the ending? Her intervention cost him the price of the ticket, and time with the brother. He may be satisfied with how he spend the time together with her, but who will make up the distraction from the picture that brought the younger brother to the lobby to find out what happened to the guy?

Oh, and remember, when the girl’s ride returned was when she left. She never did acknowledge butting into his day and his activity.

Now, will all kids growing up with cell phones maintain this ‘connectedness’, this butting into each other’s day and choices at random and without regard to respect for the other person’s choices, or will these kids learn to respect others - about the time they start trying to raise their own kids?

This entry was posted on Monday, August 27th, 2007 at 8:37 pm and is filed under Chemistry, Dating, Interactions. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.